In this post: Playtime scored by Autechre; Lullatone is good for kids, and Elijah Twin ( and that’s just the first paragraph!)

Not to brag, folks, but wow—what a great day I’m having! Well, up until losing the draft of this post that I had been working back on forth on for two hours, but whatever. Things are simply too Grizz to get me down. I imagine this is what Jorge Luis Borges woke up feeling like everyday. “Aargh, where will I be cool and postmodern today?” Last night was actually sort of a family ‘crisis’, hence I ended up babysitting my cousin. Around bedtime, he wanted to play catch, so I put some Autechre on before I said to myself, “Wut?” I promptly rectified the problem by playing the latest Lullatone. That ending up helping, as he fell asleep to the half-Japanese duo’s raindrop-like beats. When my aunt came home, she was like, ‘lol Yanni’, but hey, dat Lullatone—they can lull dem kids to sleep. When I wasn’t subjecting my young cousin to Ambient 101, I watched some TV. I managed to catch the abysmal Spy Kids 3, which, as it happens, stars Elijah Wood in a minor role. I looked up his biography again, and apparently, he likes Aphex Twin? He even has a favorite song? You can browse his celebrity playlist at ElijahNet (not joking; that’s the actual website name). I also managed to catch Destroy Build Destroy, its host being none other than ANDREW W.K. So all you partay ppl go watch that right now.

Yet today was seven times better than playing around to EP7. Things got off to a good start at the local Girl Scouts-sponsored thrift sale at the local soup kitchen, where I snagged legal, older versions—I’m talking fresh codes and all—of PhotoShop, Illustrator, and InDesign for under a buck. Three years ago, I would have blown my top over something like this, but now I’m just content with the fact that I probably saved over $2,000. I haven’t been much into making art as of late, but now that I have Illustrator, who knows? Maybe I can draw some Egon Schiele/Robert Mapplethorpe hybrid-nudes or something. What really put a smile on my face was the pair of vintage children’s keyboards I got for a buck a piece. Pics coming soon. I know you wanna see ‘em.

Afterwards, I went to the consignment shop (I had to walk across the parking lot, in my new Grizzly Bear tee; but don’t worry, guyz, even though it’s a black shirt I wasn’t hot cuz da design is printed on an American Apparel track shirt, fyi), where a nice man chatted with me about vinyl. “Ya collect vinyl?” he asked. “No, I need a record player first,” I said. “Looking for an old one?” he asked. “ Old or new. Whatever works,” I said. “Yeah, I like vinyl,” he said. I like little conversations like that (a woman at the bus stop the other day started discussing the Pixies with me).

Then, returning to the Girl Scout sale again, I bought some books (like I need more), and, even better, EVEN BETTER—a Troll piggy bank with pink hair (1991, thus semi-vintage). And by ‘Troll’ I mean ‘troll doll’—the oft-unclothed creatures with hair in RADICAL, NON-CONFORMIST COLORS! Not web trolls or Harry Potter trolls or IRL-trolls (see: beastly-people), but fun trolls—the kind that Mimi used to have on Drew Carey’s show (thanks, WikiPedia). So I washed my Troll, shampooed his hair, et cetera, and then I combed his hair on the outside porch, hoping some cute girls would come by. “HaHoHa,” one would laugh, before saying, “Mayhaps that be your troll?” To which I would respond, “Verily, my troll this be.” She would eye the troll one more time before approving of him. “A good trollkeeper you are,” she would say, and then move on. But that didn’t happen.

Finally, when I got home, my BoC tee was waiting in the mail. It’s extra skinny fit for a pseudo-Biafran such as myself. So, as of now, life under the sea is pretty decent. What’s that song about life in the sea? Well, it’s not this song.

Download "Bats Over the Pacific Ocean" by Jaguar Love (via Matador)